Sex Divas

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CurtsyI’ve never heard of sex divas and Googling the term isn’t productive because it just returns videos of divas and women who call themselves Diva performing various sex acts. No Wikipedia definition, no discussions of sex divas and relationship issues for people involved with them on more than a fleeting basis. This absence of information leads me to believe that I’ve coined a new term, possibly because there are too few sex divas in captivity to warrant having a label for them. For full disclosure, I’ve only known one sex diva and no other woman comes close to earning that title. I admit to having had a limited sample size on which to base many conclusions. However, the lack of discussion of them suggests that they are few in number and that I was unlucky enough to fall for one.

I fell in love with what I thought was a chaste girl next door in the mold of Wilma from The Best Years of Our Lives a few months before being drafted. I returned from Vietnam to a different young woman who no longer loved me.

Some years later, we connected briefly when she wanted me to comfort her after yet another man had hurt her. Shortly after arriving, she caught me completely off guard and seduced me, confident in the knowledge that I still loved her and that I’d always desired her greatly but had never attempted anything beyond necking and petting. She shocked me with the best oral sex I’ve ever experienced, before or since. I was afraid I would have a heart attack, it was so intense. Afterward, she trolled me for praise. After sex, other women have been concerned about how I felt about them, often expressing love for me and wanting me to confirm my love for them. Not her, she wanted verbal applause. She wanted to be told how great she was and how she gave incomparable blow jobs. Later, she asked me to watch her masturbate but broke off relations before we had an opportunity for her to show off her talents in that regard. She is surely a sex diva, something I think is in short supply outside the Nevada chicken ranches.

I’d love hearing about your experiences with such women?

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My uh ahh Belongs to Daddy

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The Associated Press ran an article this weekend by Sarah Skidmore Sell about a topic I thought I’d reported on before but don’t seem to have done—Sugar Daddies. To put a finer point on it, since the article was written largely from the recipient’s viewpoint, I think Sugar Babies is more accurate. The reporter interviewed several people including an anonymous female grad student attending Columbia University in New York City. She has a scholarship to cover the vast majority of her tuition but none of her living expenses in the super-expensive Big Apple. She tried having roommates, working a minimum-wage job, and freelance work but didn’t make enough to cover her expenses and her grades paid a price. Neither taking on debt nor getting mediocre grades were acceptable to her. She explained, “That’s just not why I am here. I wanted to find the most amount of money I could make for the least amount of effort.”

So, she surfed the free sites Craigslist and Backpage.com before trying SeekingArrangements.com, whose creator, Brandon Wade, began offering students a discounted rate when he learned they were a significant market. The Columbia coed currently has two sugar daddies. To one of them, she is similar to a girlfriend (except for the part about being paid) and to the other she is more like a traditional kept woman. Not mentioned was if either knows about the other or what sugar baby arrangements she has had previously, how much she receives each month, or if she reports it on her income tax.

She has already decided to continue sugar babying after graduation, remaining officially unemployed to allow her to defer repaying the $70,000 in loans she accumulated before she started doing for hire what most of her classmates do for free.

More on “sugaring” next time.

S eekingArangements3in

Using Cell Phones for Birth Control

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Most of us are all too well aware of how the current generation of college students needs to stay connected all the time, generally via cell phone. However, we assumed there were limits to the extent of their connectedness. Now, a study conducted by University of Virginia psychology researcher Kostadin Kushlev led a study with colleagues at the University of British Columbia to better understand how people interact with technology and each other.

221 University of British Columbia students were picked at random and told to set all their notifications on and keep their phones at the ready for the first week of the experiment. They were instructed to turn notifications off and minimize interaction time with their phones the second week. That participants then reported symptoms similar to those of ADHD, even though they had not been diagnosed with it was not surprising. Either was reading that 95% had looked at their screens during social events or knowing that 70% had checked their phones while at work. What was surprising is that 10% checked their phones while having sex! Keep in mind that these students were 18 to 22 and probably in relatively new relationships. They couldn’t have been old married people who were bored with their mates. One would expect young peoples’ new sexual encounters to be so intense they couldn’t be interrupted by an earthquake, let alone a cell phone call or text message.

A British study of 1,747 people (adults of a variety of ages, one assumes) found that 62% of women and 48% of men had interrupted trysts to check their cell phones to answer a call (34%), read or reply to a text (24%), or an email (2%). 34% of those who said they had checked their phones during sex claimed their partners didn’t mind. However, only 4% used social media after pausing their assignations.  I’ll reserve comment on the quality of their sex.

Family planners can use this information to reduce pregnancies, wanted and otherwise. So can parents wanting to discourage their offspring from prematurely creating offspring of their own.

 

Tookie Wonders If She Can Get a Sex Robot Off

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Something this plethora of recent articles about robot sex doesn’t address is how much more difficult it will become for us Aspie girls who desire to get our hands on a hot breathing man who’s excited to drill deep into our caverns or, like me, to see their reactions when I unexpectedly pleasure them as only I can. I can’t imagine playing games with machines.  Their reactions would be…robotic at best.  I may be unusual for an Aspie because I like to play games with men, with their minds and aroused bodies.

I find myself attracted to men with poor social skills, often Aspie boys, perhaps because I can get away with things more polished guys wouldn’t tolerate. I don’t know how I could get the upper hand with a robot. It would do what I command without question, provided it’s in his repertoire. If it’s not—and many things I’d like to do but haven’t—wouldn’t be, I’d have to break it down step by step to basic actions he—yes, although I’m not a girly girl, I don’t need another vagina to entertain me—would have been programmed to do. I suppose I could program things into his memory by first telling him that I’m teaching him something new and giving it a name, then taking him through what I want him to do step by step.

A quick internet search tells me that sex dolls, toys and robots with vibrating, rotating tongues to please the ladies are already on the market. My Sidney will quickly learn to give me rusty trumpets without demanding I reciprocate. I will reciprocate in different ways—reciprocate isn’t the right word because pleasuring men gives me great pleasure. However, much of the thrill I get is doing them when they least expect it. But how will I get such reactions from a robot?

Dental Robot

Dental robot with working tongue.

 

Smell Dating Up Close & Personal

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A couple of posts back, I reported on another bad idea whose time had come—smell dating. NYU researchers had participants wear a single t-shirt for several days then send it to them to cut it into pieces and forward the pieces to prospect lovers, independent of any sexual preference. The Brits, as reported by an Irish woman, have taken this a long step further by smell dating in person. In “Romancing the Armpit: Armpit Speed Dating Launches in London,” Anne Sewell describes “the world’s first armpit-sniffing, speed dating event.”

Romancing the Armpit organizers Sam Bompas and Harry Parr had paper bags with nose holes placed over participants’ heads and covered their noses with paper cups to conduct the blind smell test. One by one, they would evaluate their dates’ aromas and record them on note cards. To make the test more reliable, organizers gave daters cocktails blended specifically to both relax them and to cause them to sweat and release body odors normally masked by deodorants.

Bompas and Parr claimed their soiree would bring about “love, happiness and hormones,” calling their event “a small scale revolt against a highly deodorized world and online dating.” They claim a scientific basis for smell dating, saying, “Our body odor is largely influenced by Major Histocompatibility Complex (MHC) molecules, which are genetically determined and linked to the immune system. MHC is also linked to sexual preference, so differences in body odor are detected and responded to on the basis of an individual’s gender and sexual orientation.”

One armpit smeller said, “There was a lot of smelly people. Only one person I liked the smell of and I’ve just seen him and I don’t think he’s attractive.”

Previously, Bompas & Parr held an “Anatomical Whisky Tasting,” during which spirits were served in the contours of participants’ bodies.

Romancing the Armpit

 

 

Who’s Er Not Sleeping in My Bed?

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 “If your partner isn’t faithful, then at least your mattress will be.”

Tech geeks working for bed maker Durmet in Spain have developed the “Smarttress” that looks like a regular double-bed mattress but has sensors concealed in it. These sensors, we’re told, differentiate between sexual motions and movements of more mundane sorts by the use of special algorithms. Whenever a suspicious motion is detected the partner who suspects she or he is being cuckolded is warned in real-time via cell phone message.

Spain? Why Spain? Some surveys suggest that Spaniards are among the most unfaithful lovers on the planet. Ashley Madison, the go to website to arrange extramarital affairs (at least until their site was hacked and names of subscribers were made public) claims to have over a million subscribers in Spain. Spanish Ashley Madisonian males have 2.4 clandestine affairs a year where their female counterparts have only(?) 1.3. One assumes that Ashley Madison affairs represent the numbers of different people subscribers hook up with each year. The number of trysts per affair is probably not recorded. Inquiring minds believe the number of assignations per subscriber per year to be well into double digits, although not evenly distributed among rendezvous partners.

One of the reasons Durmet thinks their product will be successful in the marketplace is that the latest infidelity research in Spain found that 94% of Spaniards prefer to make love in their own homes rather than in motels, seedy or otherwise.

The software engineers designed the computer programs located in their servers to detect “suspicious activity regarding time of use, frequency, intensity or speed.” When the algorithms identify undesired activity on the mattress, it informs the cuckold immediately, and graphically, which parts of the bed are experiencing the most action, making it easy for the aggrieved to form a mental picture of what her or his partner is doing with someone else.

No statistics were provided regarding increased assaults and shootings.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/04/15/smart-mattress-lets-you-know-if-your-partner-is-cheating/

Will Global Warming Increase Orgasms?

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Rep. Barbara Lee (D-Calif.) proposed recently that global warming would force women into prostitution:

“[F]ood insecure women with limited socioeconomic resources may be vulnerable to situations such as sex work, transactional sex, and early marriage that put them at risk for HIV, STIs, unplanned pregnancy, and poor reproductive health,”

BBC News reports that brain scans can determine whether a woman is faking an orgasm or is actually having one. Professor Gert Holstege of the University of Groningen in The Netherlands explained to a 2005 fertility conference that in faked orgasms the motor cortex—the conscious part of the brain—is visible on the scan because it is activated. During real orgasms, movements aren’t conscious and the motor cortex isn’t activated. He observed, “Women can imitate orgasm quite well,” when their motor cortices showed red during orgasms they intentionally faked.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/4111360.stm

Holstege also found that women with cold feet only reached orgasm 50% of the time in spite of their partners’ best manual efforts. Wearing socks increased the success rate to 80%. Global warming may or not be harmful economically to women but science shows they may have more fun.

Lee’s fears about women turning to prostitution may be overstated because of the advancements in robot technology. For a mere $50,000, Hong Kong graphic designer created a lookalike Scarlett Johansson. Apparently not sexually active, she is still a threat to flesh and blood women in that she looks so real. Also, she is just version 1. Japanese developers have rudimentary sex robots for sale already. Some predict reasonably lifelike female sex robots will be out in a decade—well before global warming is predicted to overheat the world. Others say they won’t be available for men to buy until 2050, still years before global warming will be propelling poor women into the world’s oldest profession. Some would say this is a good thing. Libertarians might disagree. All I will say is that I want mine to look like Tookie.

 

Smell Dating

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This is not a parody; this is serious. I didn’t make this up to win a bet or anything. This is just honest reporting.

Just when you think you’ve heard everything, someone comes up with something you would’ve regarded as too stupid (or gross) to consider. Smell Dating’s new approach suggests that New York singles have trouble meeting Mr. or Miss Right in that city of millions. It also suggests that techniques used by people in other locales for millennia for determining if they’re interested in meeting someone don’t work for New Yorkers. Here’s the scheme:

For a $25 fee, matchees receive a T-shirt to wear for three straight days. Bathing is not allowed. My immediate reactions are: 1) this is for use in the winter only, 2) only for sedentary people who don’t work physical jobs or exercise, and 3) have poor or bizarre senses of smell.

Here comes the hard part. When the T-shirts are properly marinated, wearers remove them by pulling them past their noses and off over their heads, the quicker the better. The more sensitive seal them into Ziploc bags to keep the aroma from permeating everything in the room. The T-shirts are mailed back to Smell Dating for processing.

Tega Brain and Sam Lavigne, teacher and researcher, respectively, at NYU receive the aromatic shirts and cut them into swatches labeled with the number of the client who wore the shirt. (Now we know why NYU charges the highest undergraduate tuition of any college in the country.) They send each client a set of ten swatches from other clients, without regard to sexual preference.

Clients then whiff each swatch to identify which, if any, smell like a person they’d like to date. No results of the outcome of the success rate for this matching have been posted.

 

Virtual Reality sex for Aspies

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Virtual Reality (VR) has been used as a tool for people on the autistic spectrum and articles about partner-free sex are being published with increasing frequency, primarily for young men. Little, however, has been mentioned about VR sex for autistics, especially women. Aspergirls, especially those who enjoy masturbating as their preferred sex act, might find greater enjoyment with visual stimulation as accompaniment to pleasuring themselves manually, with a dildo or aided by a vibrator. VR could be used as a training device for unintuitive young women wanting to have sexual experiences. Such devices could protect them from being exploited by men or women just wanting to use them for sex.

Woman with VR gogglesNow that inexpensive VR devices that couple with smart phones are on the market, all that remains to be developed is software. Much VR porn has been developed, both animated and with actors, and is becoming more realistic all the time. At least one vendor advertises 3D holograms that claims to allow the viewer to be a pornstar. “This new technology not allows you not only to touch the actress but also react to their motions.” Note that most of what’s available is geared toward 20-something males having intercourse with or receiving oral sex from a woman. Special devices are included to make either experience more realistic. Being immersed in the making of a porn film is probably too intense for mature Aspies and would likely be downright scary for young, inexperienced ones.

A Spanish couple’s company produces interactive porn movies that control a vibrator or a dongle, depending on the sex of the viewer, to create a lifelike feel for the encounter. Again, inexperienced Aspie girls would probably be overwhelmed by such an encompassing exposure.

Perhaps the ideal application for Aspergirls would be scenarios in which a supportive, but not sexy, guides her through learning to masturbate, then on to using a vibrator, cheering her on and applauding her efforts along the way. Since learning when and where masturbation is acceptable, more advanced scenarios would place her in a random variety of locations and situations in which she would received positive reinforcement for pleasuring herself in appropriate places and negative reinforcement elsewhere.

With sex robots on the way, this VR world will likely change very rapidly in the near future. One positive is that young men with poor social skills will probably not find a need to take advantage of naïve Aspies.

 

Thwarting Devious Men

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Women can also use SwimCount to reduce their chances of a men unexpectedly injecting buns into our fertile ovens. Some of you may have already run into fiends who falsely claim to have had vasectomies or whose operations somehow failed to prevent impregnation. It’s easy to succumb to the siren calls of “let’s go bareback” because it feels oh so much better. I love feeling a man erupt inside me but hate the disruption of another abortion. SwimCount can tell you if he’s shooting blanks with as much precision as it does with evaluating quality swimmers.

Don’t count on it for your one-night stands or spur-of-the-moment romps because, while SwimCount gives you valuable information about his ability to inseminate you, it says nothing about STDs. So, like them or not, girls, you best put raincoats on strange willies you take in.

Panties.pngSpeaking of strange willies, if you’ve been getting some cock on the side and you throw your used panties into the hamper, you might have to worry about being caught. Because not everything that comes into us stays there, we leave trails of our sexual behavior. CheckMate is a product used by husbands, boyfriends, and detectives to determine if we’ve been fooling around. It takes advantage of the fact that semen can continue to drip out of us up to 72 hours after he deposits it. CheckMate uses a strip sort of like a litmus paper to instantaneously detect the presence of semen on underwear or panty liners.

Fortunately, there are simple ways to defeat the test: have sex with your live-in shortly before or after stepping out on him. If you find that too disgusting, use panty shields and discard them where he can’t find them. And be sure not to let your lovers make Bill Clinton’s famous “blue dress” mistake.

I’m looking out for you girls,

Tookie